What Happened to Alice

If You Can't Take The Heat...

I hate the heat. I will frequently say in the summer “It’s too freakin hot”. Some one always says, wait until February when we’re all freezing. I’m never freezing, and if I am, I can add layers on…please tell me what more I can remove and still be socially acceptable. 

No, I hate it. Know what I hate more, cooking in it, in my house, and making it hotter. I have no sweet clue how I went all last summer, WHILE PREGNANT, without using my BBQ. I mean I survived, but wow. AND after the baby was born I was terrified of the heat. I legit had bowls of ice in front of fans in the room I was sharing with my husband, my infant, and our walking furnace the dog. Have you heard the saying, “Cold babies cry, hot babies die”? I hadn’t until last summer, then it haunted me. 

Needless to say, Brock survived. But I swore up and down this would not happen again. This summer, I have done all I can to avoid using my stove. The oven has been used on days I would make Jake wear a jacket only. The burners, I’ve even avoided them. My slow cooker has dust on it, and that’s huge because in cooler months I use it multiple times a week. 

No, I have been grilling. Once upon a time, a tank of propane could last me the summer. We’ve refilled twice already. I have learned to cook meats, and vegetables. I have done pasta and rice on the BBQ. Basically I have tried to figure out every which way to avoid my kitchen. 

I’m curious though, what creative ways do you use your grill?

Let me know, I’m open to ideas. 

-Mama Bear Out

Post Covid

A Struggle We Don't Talk About

Y’know, there are a lot of aspects of parenthood that people talk about being a struggle, but there was one I experienced this week, that I feel like no one talks about much. I’m talking about the wardrobe change out. It’s not so bad now with Jake, because it does not happen often and it’s exciting now. I’m talking about when you’re trading out those little, tiny sleepers. 

I did struggle with it with Jake, but I reminded myself, “there is a 50/50 chance you will use these again”. And I did. Now I am packing them up, for good. 

When I’m emotionally stable I go through and pull-out items that I just can’t part with. These are things like the sleeper that was the first thing BOTH ever wore, the dinosaur outfit that was only ever Brock’s, or the outfit Cale picked out before Jake was born. 

Brock is also bigger than Jake was at this age. I assumed that Brock and Jake would have no overlap between their specific Winter or specific summer clothes. Jake’s birthday is in March, and Brock’s is in August. But that recently proved to be inaccurate. Brock got the switch over to 12m-18m. This was roughly what Jake was wearing in his second Summer, when he was almost a year and a half. Brock will be one next month. Do you see where I’m going with this?

The point is, not only is Brock growing fast on me, but he’s also faster than I’m prepared for. I have talked about this with my sister in-law, and I know that I’m not the only one struggling. So, share with me your stories. What was the hardest item to put away to never be worn again?

-Mama Bear Out

Simplifying. ALWAYS Freakin Simplifying

I don’t know about you, but when it comes to parenthood, I try and make it as simple as possible. I am constantly looking for ways to simplify my life. 

Example, meal planning. I have 7 weekly menus I rotate. There are tweaks here and there, but it saves me from looking at a blank page thinking, what the hell am I going to feed my family. Or worse, walking into the grocery store with absolutely no plan. 

Even though I am on Maternity leave, Jake still goes to the sitter. I had mixed feelings about that when I first found out I was pregnant. BUT it was the right call for several reasons. #1, It would be unreasonable for me to ask the sitter to hold not one, but now two spots while I was out. This is her livelihood, and she probably wouldn’t have anyway. #2, Jake would miss his friends. We got a taste of him not going over for two months at the beginning of covid. He was heart broken and thought his friends were mad at him. #3 It’s good for him to get out and play with other kids. Covid has made this more difficult for friends to mingle, but daycares fell into a different category. #4 This was easier on me when I was adjusting with a new baby, and gave Brock and I the same bonding time as I got with Jake. 

Now that I have rambled about all of that, let’s get to my point. The two most annoying and stressful times of day were bedtime, and trying to get him out the door in the morning. Note I said were. I found a way to simplify that recently. I was forgetting to do things, or remembering at the last minute, and I am not a last minute person. What’s more when we were potty training Jake one of the biggest motivators for him was the scoreboard. So what could I do that would motivate him visually, and me to make sure I don’t feel rushed and I get everything done. A list. I live off lists. So I made a checklist sheet for Jake. It gives him 6 tasks in the morning to complete, 6 at bedtime, and 6 questions for Cale and I to answer. When he completes a task he runs to the fridge to check the item off his list. This has saved SO much time and there is little to no stress to me.  Now I tailored it for us and our routine, so here are the things I included on the list:moto

Mornings:

Did you have a good breakfast?  I emphasized good because far too often I would hear “Mom, I want marshmallow cereal”. Much like their father, my boys love their cereal, but recently, I haven’t bought Lucky charms (marshmallow cereal), I have grabbed the whole grain cereals. A good breakfast means he has cereal, fruit and sometimes Greek yogurt. 

Have you brushed your teeth?

Have you washed your face and hands? Side note, pretty sure my 3 year old does a better job washing his hands than I did at 8.

Have you gotten dressed?

Have you brushed your hair?  Really doesn’t need to be reminded, he loves brushing his hair

Have you packed your backpack?

Evenings:

Have you picked up your books and toys?  This is the hardest one in our house. It can be like pulling teeth and even with the motivation to him. He is getting better though

Have you brushed your teeth?

Have you had a pee?  Without fail, every night, we would be told just before we left his room, I need to pee. He’s 3, we can’t not take him to pee. So now he does it before bed, and we can remind him of that. 

Have you washed up? 

Have you put on your Pj’s?

Have you gotten your water?  This fell into the same category as the pee, prolonging bedtime every night

Then we added the questions for us, this is just to show him we see when he’s doing good things

Mom and Dad, Was Jake…

Good going out?  Know when a kid who usually wizzes around the house is at his slowest? When you’re trying to get him out the door. Reminding him I will be answering that question later speeds things up

Helpful today?  Jake loves to be helpful, so this is really an opportunity for me to show him I recognize it.

A good big brother?  Almost always yes. Jake’s favorite way to help is with Brock.

Listening?

Behaving? The last two are completely self serving

Trying something new?  This is mostly geared to trying new foods. Jake is an incredibly picky eater, so if he tries a new food, he gets his check. It’s not always food, but at least 50% of the time. 

So this is a little something I put together to simplify some of the more stressful moments with little man. 

-Mama Bear Out 

A Difference Of Opinions